Understanding Better

This is another non art related post (well only art connected indirectly). I have only been seeing creation in a different light for what, less than a week, just over a week? It has already been an amazing experience. While I am in no way against any one believing whatever they want, I now not only don't believe in any "religion" but I don't like to use the work believe. I have a different understanding, and while I feel I am on the right path, I can not say it is the only path or that I am not way off the truth. If the Devine Spirit, Creator or whatever you want to call it is "God" for you, that is fine, but for me the word God is just to limited a concept and I won't use it anymore. Devine Spirit is ok but still so not right, but I guess I have to call it something. The Universe is another term but that has a "physical" definition already and that is of course to limited as well.
The way I see it, it would be like one of my cells saying that it understood how I thought or what I felt and of course, it is nothing like me even though it is part of me. It has no clue or concept of what I want, think, feel. So when ANYONE or any book claims to tell us what "God" wants, thinks or feels, you can be sure they don't really have a clue!
In the time since my eyes have been opened I have learned SO much. I am beginning to think that being a "Christian" or "Muslim" or following any religion makes you blind to the truth. We are taught that we should believe a certain way, not question anything and do what our "leaders" tell us. This is stupidity and goes against any idea of freedom or of real thought.
I still plan to post art and not other stuff here, but my brain is so full now of these new thoughts, ideas and understandings that I had to put it down someplace.
The Infinite..maybe that is the right term, is so far beyond our understanding that we all are delusional and maybe even insane to not only claim we have the answers, but to claim they come from "God". We can only try and live as the best we can be and to be one with everything. Hate and fear and judgment are all in opposition to this goal. Guilt and self loathing or doubt and trying to force anyone to be anything that they are not, is simply wrong. Using "God" or religion to justify hate and prejudice is evil and vile and we should all fight this. And claiming that it is not hate of prejudice because your "religion" says whatever you are being against is wrong, is just a lie deep inside, those who claim that excuse know they are wrong.

OK, I am starting to sound like I am preaching so I will stop. If anyone actually reads this and wants to discuss anything I will happily go on in private or in comments.

Medival, Sort Of

I realized I have not posted much of my SCA scroll work here, only the new stuff I have done this year. So here is a bad scan (all I have of it) of a periodish piece. It is based on Celtic works but also on more modern/realistic Celtic art. If I can ever get a good scan of it I would love to sell prints of the panels (the Raven side and the Hern side). This was an open commission, they paid me but didn't give me much in the way of what they wanted, other than their AoA (Award of Arms) scroll. Personally I love it and will get a good scan eventually if I bug the owner for enough years! It is 9 x 12 or so if I remember right. Acrylic on watercolor paper or Bristol, again, I can't recall. This was done back in the early 90's I think.

New Visions

Actually I did this a while ago, in 2001. This was partly inspired by an artist whose work combines amazing pencil work with color. I really like it but his is much better. I may try more in this style someday but for now it's more or less a one of a kind where my work is concerned. "Emerald Eyes", about 10 x 10 I think. Pencil and watercolor colored pencil with a tiny bit of Acrylic on Canson paper.

New Understanding

As the Buddhist monk said to the hot dog vendor, "Make me one with everything". This is my new understanding of how I should be. I have evolved, progressed, grown, however you want to say it beyond the petty, legalistic, hateful "religion" I once believed in. In another 50 years, I may change again but I somehow doubt it. To not fight the universe but to embrace it, to not fear, but to welcome...I already feel so different. Here is a picture that in no way shows what I am talking about but somehow feels like a good image for how I am thinking now. "Space Dolphins" done in 1992, Acrylic and Prisma color on grey mat board. I think it's about 15 x 20, maybe smaller.

Another Time, Another Me

Back when I was in my 20's, I painted a large self portrait. This was done during a winter when I had little to do but work at a job that was not stimulating and paint. I have very few of the works I did then saved. But this 30 x 40 painting on canvas is still with me. My mother liked this so much she now has a print of it hanging in her livingroom. I was blond (which she said she didn't like) and this is an odd cross time self portrait. The face is me then, the background is from my memories of Atlantis and my first incarnation (Nothing to do with lasers and high tech etc). The triangular building in the distance is the Temple Mountain, a temple to the Moon God. If anyone wants to know more about my memories of Atlantis etc. feel free to ask.

I love the staff and want one! The only things in this picture that were physically there for me to paint were me, the crystal and the sea shells. Everything else came from my mind.

If God Had Wanted Me To Be Accepting Of Gays, He Would Have Given Me The Warmth And Compassion To Do So

BY JANE KENDRICKS
I don't question God. The Lord is my Shepherd and I shall put none above Him. Which is why I know that if it were part of God's plan for me to stop viciously condemning others based solely on their sexual preference, He would have seen fit—in His infinite wisdom and all—to have given me the tiniest bit of human empathy necessary to do so.
It's a simple matter of logic, really. God made me who I am, and who I am is a cold, anti-gay zealot. Thus, I abhor gay people because God made me that way. Why is that so hard to understand?
Here, let's start with the basic facts: I hate and fear gay people. The way they feel is different from how I feel, and that causes me a lot of confusion and anger. Everyone knows God is all-powerful. He could easily have given me the capacity to investigate what's behind those feelings rather than tell strangers in the park they're going to hell for holding hands. But God clearly has another path for me. And who am I to question His divine will?
Compassion, tolerance, understanding, basic decency, the ability to put myself in another person's position: God could have endowed me with any of those traits and yet—here is the crucial part—He didn't. Why? Because the Creator of the Universe wants me to demonize homosexuals in an effort to strip them of their fundamental human rights.
I'm sorry, but you can't possibly ask me to explain everything God does. He works in mysterious ways, remember?
Try to understand. If I were capable of thinking and acting any other way, then I'm sure I would, but God seems to be quite adamant about this one. He's just not budging at all. So unless our almighty Lord and Savior decides to change His mind about my ability to empathize on even the most basic level—which I find highly unlikely—then everyone is just going to have to accept the fact that I'm going to keep on hating homosexuals. And I know that He will fill me with the strength to remain mindless and hurtful in the face of adversity.
Which isn't to say that my faith hasn't been tested. Believe me, there have been times when I've drifted from the bitter and terrified life God has chosen for me. When my younger brother told me he was gay, it shook my faith to its very core. But here I am, 27 years later, still refusing to take his calls. Just the way God intended.
It's actually pretty astonishing how many complaints to the school board you can make regarding the new band teacher you've never met when you are filled with the Light of Christ and devoid of any real kindness or mercy toward His other children.
At the end of the day, I'm just trying to lead a good Christian life. That means going to church on Sunday, following the Ten Commandments, and fighting what I believe to be a sexual abomination through a series of petty actions and bitter comments made under my breath. Sure, I sometimes wish God would just reach into my heart and give me the ability to treat all people with, at the very least, the decency and respect they deserve as human beings. But unfortunately for that new couple who moved in three houses down, He hasn't yet.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have God's work to do.

(While this appreared in an issue of "The Onion" it strikes home as true of so many who represent the Christian community).

Large Commission Finished

I finally got the large dragon commission done. This was allot of work. The background alone took many many layers and much work. The dragon has about 8 layers including thousands of individual scales/bumps. I was asked to do a realistic, non fantasy dragon. I used real lizards, mostly Monitors as my base. The client wanted a brown/bronze color, they wanted the dragon to be about to pounce (lizards just stand very still before pouncing). I decided to make it about to attack some birds and so the one raised claw. "Draconis Tristanis, the Bird Hunting Dragon" 20 x 30, Acrylic and watercolor colored pencil on Canson board. 62